How NOT to Get Boiled Like the Frog: Mindfulness and the Life Process Program

The Frog-in-the-Pot Model

There’s an old story about a frog in a pot of water. At first, the water is cool, even pleasant. The frog has no reason to worry. But slowly, very gradually, the heat is turned up. The frog feels warmer and warmer, but it’s still bearable, so it doesn’t jump out. By the time the frog realizes the water’s too hot, it’s too late.

Many stories about addiction follow the frog-in-the-pot model. An unsuspecting drinker or opioid painkiller user incurs substance use problems until, voila — SUD.

Does that occur with all substance users? Obviously not — it’s only a minority.

But how does an SUD sneaking up on you actually happen?

More importantly— how can it be nipped in the bud, or even reversed?

The Addiction Process

Think about the person developing an SUD. At one time drinking or drug use might have been harmless—perhaps it was even beneficial. A way to relax after a long day. A way to deal with stress or anxiety, or physical pain.

At first, it worked. It was comforting, relieving — just like the warm water in that pot. The person didn’t feel the need to jump out of the pot or turn the heat down.

But over time, maybe the person’s substance use and consequences began to change in a negative way.

Maybe they started drinking or using to offset bad feelings, rather than for enjoyment or necessary but manageable relief and comfort.

Maybe that gave them less flexibility in their use. They had to drink or take pills regularly — a certain number or amount. Perhaps that amount increased.

The telltale sign is when the use starts to affect other parts of the person’s life—their relationships, their health, their work and daily functioning— overall their sense of responsibility and their reliability.

How Do You Prevent the Water from Boiling Over?

The question the person might ask is where the control is in their life.

Can a person really lose control of their life to substance use or some other addiction without realizing it?

Perhaps a better question is how you can avoid — or reverse — such a development in your life.

The Life Process Program believes that you control this process through self-awareness — mindfulness, if you will.

LPP creates the space and the mindset to sense how hot the water is in your own life.

We at LPP don’t tell you how hot the water is. For one reason, only you can say how hot it is. Our helpers at LPP make no judgments — only you can meaningfully answer the question: “How hot is my pot?”

But we don’t just stop there. We don’t tell you to quit drinking or using drugs. That’s not our approach.

What we do is help you reflect on your own values — your own thermometer, so to speak.

What matters most to you? What kind of life do you want to live? How do your current choices line up with those values? That is, when do you feel the water you are soaking in exceeds your acceptable standards for a nice soak bath?

Above and Beyond

Above and beyond simply checking the heat, the Life Process Program encourages you to think positively about yourself and where you are “swimming” towards.

This pot is not sitting on some isolated range. This is your life!

Who do you want to be? Who are you when you’re at your best? What have you already achieved in life that you’re proud of? We ask you to consider how you would describe yourself to someone you admire. And when you do that, you’ll see—you’re not defined by your drinking or drug use. You’re defined by your strengths, your successes, and the things that make you who you truly are.

With that in mind, the water can never truly reach a heat that overwhelms you. You won’t let that happen. At least for too long — to where you boil — and certainly not “forever.”

Here’s where the analogy of the frog fails when applied to your drinking, drug use, or other addiction.

If the frog had the foresight to see where the warming water was leading, it would have jumped out or turned the heat down early on. If it had the space and mindfulness to reflect on where things were headed, it could have taken action sooner.

Likewise, if you feel like your relationship with alcohol or drugs has started to become problematic, this is your chance to check your life’s water temperature by asking some important questions.

• Are you living in line with your values?
• Are you the person you want to be?
• Are you fulfilling your obligations to your family, friends, job, community?
• Who, ultimately, are you at your core?

The Life Process Program doesn’t label you or tell you what you should do. We simply offer you the space and the tools to reflect and make decisions that work for yourself. It’s not about jumping out of the pot in a panic. It’s about recognizing when the water’s getting warmer and making thoughtful, positive choices about how to turn down the heat.

You’re not a label. You’re not just an alcoholic or an addict. You’re someone with values, strengths, and the potential to live a life that’s meaningful and fulfilling. The Life Process Program helps you reconnect with those parts of yourself and offers you the opportunity to make changes that align with who you really are.

Before the pot boils over.

(Poor unreflective frog!)